oh...and my highly entertaining friday...

woke up. went for a run. got ready to go to the airport. running late.

decide to put lipliner on in dan's truck on the way to the airport.we hit a bump as i am putting it on. and i make an berry colored stripe on the roof of his truck interior.

i always have a paranoia of forgetting my drivers license. which makes no sense because it never leaves my purse. but i go thru my wallet and it's not there. i go through it again. it's still not there...one more time. nope. still not there.we go back to the house. i search EVERYWHERE. it's gone. cancel flight and rebook on later one.

go to dmv for new license. get new license. but no picuture on it...just temp. paper one. a miricle did happen. no line at the dmv. none. and the person working was intelligent and friendly. little did i know how i would pay for this luck later that day...anyways, i hope it works as id.

back to airport. wait 45 minutes to check ski bag. had the guy my costco card (the only 'id' i have with a picture on it) with the license. whew. it's ok.

get in the security line.

30 minutes later? in security line. an hour later? still in security line. finally...i see the light. er, the metal detectors.

take mp3 player, cell phone, walkman out of purse. put purse through scanner. i walk through the metal detector. i beep. i never beep. the metal i am wearing? birkenstock buckles and metal buttons on my jeans. i am taken aside for a 'special' search. i don't want to be specially searched. i'm ordinary. not special.

they decide my bag is suspcicious and also needs a 'special search'. so now am i really special? do i get a prize for all this? i wait, frustrated, as i did everything i could think of to avoid this mess. in my purse? wallet. pens. books. paper. tin of lip balm.

they wand me. pat me down. make me sit down. take off my shoes. feel the legs of my pants. deem, after running the wand over the buttons on my jeans three times that, no, it is the buttons beeping and not some secret bomb i hid in my pants.

i wait for my bag. the open everything. take everything out. page through the books. look at the titles. open the lip balm. deem that, no, i have no bomb in my purse, either. trying to repack my bag, i drop my mp3 player in the slots between the security tables. it's a big deal to get it out. finally get it back.

go to get southwest boarding passes. number 42. and it's only 20 minutes before the flight. which is sold out. turns out being a half empty plane because everyone is stuck in monsterous security lines and misses their flight. the plane arrives we begin to board. they check my id one more time. (my temporary one has not been a problem yet) 'ah! temporary id. another search'. i looked at him. i laughed. 'you're kidding.' nope.

go through the whole everything out of my bag...wand...pat down...leg check...'but i was searched like this at the gate!' i said. 'm'am it's for your security' grrrrr...some 20-something birkenstock-wearing, carrying a fanny pack as a purse, coffee drinking girl is going to be a terrorist? at this point (if one more person told me it was for my security, including my husband, i was going to lose it) i felt violated. once? ok. not great, but i can deal. but all over again?

finally on the plane. to drink? red wine. i need it. while the flight attendant is serving me the wine, it sloshes out of the cup. all over my favorite jeans. she is very apologetic and helpful. and gives me another wine gratis. i think it all came out. at the airport, get a latte. (depressant now a stimulant. whatever) attempting to put the lid on, i slosh that all over my jeans.

i think i have used up all of my bad karma for the next month. at least i hope i have. and the rest of the trip was fine. knock on wood.