that same damn feeling today...that two tight blinks and a big swallow from crying. that same hollowness in me. strange.

i was thinking today about when i was a kid...i used to love standing on my head and wondering what the world would be like if we walked on the ceiling instead of the floor. how you would have to step over the wall to get through a door. how you could slide down the stairs. on the ceiling, of course. how odd hanging light fixtures would look, suspended in mid-air. how i could ponder these things for quite some time, my mind excited, discovering new ways of looking at things. i hope i am always able to keep a piece of that delight in discovering in my head...

well. i had a good day skiing. and i had lots of good things to tell...i was going to write them all up here. but i can't seem to do it. a crazy sort of mood hit - despair, sadness, hopelessness. why am i so sensitive? gotta get out if it...

but, the day was great because of: 2 feet of fresh snow, no lift lines, perfect weather, and we skiied free. oh and sushi for dinner..

armed with a border's gift certificate, and the desire to replace the 'august and everything after' cd that was stolen a few years back that i just never got around to replacing (for shame, i know, i know), i hit border's this afternoon. that cd *is* my freshman year in college. my fist copy was 'lost' (borrowed, not returned) that year. replaced it once already. was stolen again when my house was broken into...so now on copy three.

and every time she sneezes i believe it's it's love and
oh lord.... i'm not ready for this sort of thing

picked up the fight club dvd. the only movie i have seen that i would actually want to see over and over again. love it. and some books. oh, how i love bookstores. how cool would it be to live in one? especially one with a coffee shop...you'd always have entertainment, you could learn about so many different things. the barnes and noble that i used to frequent at cal poly had big armchairs, too. the kind that just swallow you up. i'd be set. books books books... :)

got a cup of coffee (decaf, it was 3pm) and a couple of magazines - organic style, outside and in style. pure fluff...but they're fun to page through with a steaming cup of coffee. (alissa heaven, you see, big chair. reading stuff. coffee. just missing some music)...anyways, guess what was 'featured' in the cool stuff pages of in style? yup. none other than the infamous one sweet whirrled. it appeared, in the picture, at least, that they will be making a bar, too. there are too many commas in that sentence but i am too lazy to figure out the grammatically correct way. you get what i am trying to say, don't you? (this is your clue to nod yes). so dmb ice cream is cool (pun intended) enough to make the trendy hollywood mag. now, if they would only start carrying it at my grocery store...nuff links for you? :P

hmm...don't know if this is a good thing to be. i don't even like beer!...though, if i wasn't, the quiz said i'd be chocolate...

I tashte like Alcohol. Heh. Heh. I taste like beer. I like beer. Buy me a beer. I'm not drunk, I can drink plenty without... What was I saying? Beer. What Flavour Are You?

rest in peace, warren harding. one of the yosemite hardmen from the golden years of climbing. truly amazing.

Harding was best known for making the first ascent of El Capitan, an expedition he led up the "Nose" of the peak that reached the top on Nov. 12, 1958.

Harding was also the first to climb the east face of Washington Column, the south face of Mount Watkins, the south face of Half Dome, the Porcelain Wall, Keeler Needle and the west face of Mount Conness

i am somehow just not remotely suprised by this...

Calif. Voters Deal Condit Final Political Defeat

is the john mayer show at the fillmore sold out ALREADY? i hope not. anyone?

interesting weekend. skiing in tahoe. put up at a swanky hotel ($300 a night! sheesh), a day of skiing (fun, though very snobby people ski at heavenly, i have now discovered. as well as the damn snowboarder that crashed into me), a massage, a $1100 dinner (for 10 of us, but still, it is by far the biggest tab i have ever seen)...all paid for by dan's company. figured they spent over $1000 on us this weekend.

guess i get a taste for the weekend how i would live if i had Too Much Money. i drank $4 water from the minibar, a $3 cup of coffee, a $65 bottle of wine...sounds like quite the life, eh? it certainly isn't all it's cracked up to be. i would've much rather had $1000 and had them give dan a week off of work so we could drive all over the place, camping and climbing. with $1000 we could camp like kings. and still have money left over.

it just seemed like such a waste to me...a $1100 dinner? $1100? it's just wrong. could've fed many families for weeks on end. i was embarrassed to spend money like that. felt so selfish. i guess the company provides it as an 'award' for making the employees give up their lives for their jobs. i'd rather have a husband that came home at 6pm everyday than some extravagant weekend. why does the business world have such a screwed up value system? make 'em work 70 hour a week...and give them a weekend away every year. huh? and that's supposed to be a fair trade? it baffles me. i guess that's why i work for myself. i just do't understand it.